Sleeping on the job

The great thing about the Bay Ridge CSA is that the community is so eclectic. Whether you’re Democratic or Republican, rich or poor, a food lover or just a food eater, there’s room for everybody within the confines of the group. And the fact is that from the toddler who helps pick her mother or father select the vegetables at the pick-up, through to the more elderly member who joined the CSA because the vegetables taste more like they did when he was a kid, the CSA is open to everybody of all ages.

All of this got me to wondering about the average Friday night of the CSA member who waits eagerly under their inbox waiting patiently – nay, desperately – for this email to fall into their loving arms from on high. I’ve always wondered what you’re getting up to as I’m sitting here, desperately coming up with enough words to persuade the big bosses at the Bay Ridge CSA to keep me on the books.

It’s this latent curiosity that led me to invent the Bay Ridgualizer™, a groundbreaking machine made from bits of scrap metal and a couple of tons of garlic scapes. I keep it in my mother-in-law’s garage, if you must know. Each week this glorious machine enables me to see right into the murky and hitherto private world of the members of this saintly parish. And frankly, it’s not a pretty sight

Powered only by cooking oil derived from deep frying falafel, the Bay Ridgualizer™ has already shown me exactly why there’s a cucumber shortage on 79th Street (you don’t want to know), and why one of our members is always the last person through the gates for the pickup (let’s just say that the tumble dryer at the laundry is ridiculously slow). It’s given me a fascinating insight into one man’s peculiar obsession with Betty White, and the less said about the 101 uses that one member has found for beets, the better.

Of course, the irony would be that if you could turn the Bay Ridgualizer™ on my good self this evening, you’d find a poor beaten soul who – already overwhelmingly conquered by jetlag – was unwittingly given a drowsy anti-histamine by his loving wife only moments before settling down to write this esteemed journal. Still, it’ll take more than a few pharmaceutical drugs to bring down this wri….zzzzzzzzzz.

Apologies, I just fell asleep on my computer and now I have a QWERTY imprint on my forehead. Probably best I head off before somebody complains.

Here’s what you can expect to receive in this week’s share:

Red Beets
Garlic Scapes
Summer Squash

Message from the farm:
We are not always so diligent about sending newsletters during the busy season, but this summer we have tasked some of our farm crew members with updating farm images on Instagram. Head over to our page to see what’s happening at Hearty Roots!

Fruit shares
Fruit shares will begin next week!

We are in an egg lull right now, as our new hens haven’t started laying much yet, so some of this week’s eggs come from our wonderful neighbors at Sparrowbush Farm, where they use the same GMO-free feed and pasture-raised practices that we do.

Thanks so much for your membership in the farm!

–Ben + Lindsey + family, and the Hearty Roots Crew

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